Surviving the holidays with Aphasia
Aphasia is a disorder that results from damage to portions of the brain that are responsible for language. For most people, these areas are on the left side of the brain. Aphasia usually occurs suddenly, often following a stroke or head injury, but it may also develop slowly, as the result of a brain tumor or a progressive neurological disease, like dementia.
Aphasia can present differently in each individual, but it almost always affects ones ability to comprehend language and/or communicate. It may become difficult to process verbal information, facial expressions, or body language. A person with aphasia may also experience difficulty finding words or organizing their thoughts in order to convey a message. These difficulties can range from mild to severe.
Its all too easy for a person with Aphasia to become frustrated, isolated and depressed, especially around the holidays when their families gather for what was once a great time to catch up and find out what’s new with our loved ones. As their ability to communicate is affected, they may feel cut off from their loved ones and the world around them. Alternatively, they can feel overwhelmed and anxious in busy social environments, such as those found around a Thanksgiving table, holiday party, or restaurant. These tips can help you to support someone with Aphasia during those holiday gatherings we love so dearly.
minimize noise as much as possible - mute the football game and don’t play music in the background at the dinner table
consider making two or three small dinner tables instead of one large table
if planning a restaurant outing - ask for a private room if able, or an area that is less noisy and has little foot traffic. Have the person with aphasia sit on the end of the table instead of in the middle
give your loved one with aphasia a break - encourage them to step outside in the quiet for a moment when you notice they are not engaged
ask simple questions and assure you have their full attention; allow extra time for them to respond with more detail
don’t talk to them like they are less than their age or have lost intelligence; aphasia is not a loss of intelligence - it is a loss of the ability to communicate
if you are not getting anywhere and/or your loved one becomes frustrated - do not keep trying; instead tell them you will revisit the topic and try again when it’s not so busy.
Make sure your loved one with aphasia knows you value their opinion and that you want to hear about it later. Tell them you understand how difficult it must be in such a busy environment and that you are so happy they chose to be present despite the challenge. Sometimes the person with aphasia just needs to know you get it, and you will not give up on them. They will be heard. If not today, there’s always tomorrow.